You Owe Me This Much
by kady.cullen
Summary: After the Cullens left, Bella went on with her life as normally as she could, until someone from her tragic past returns. She soon finds herself in an unlikely friendship which helps her finally move on. Complete summary inside.
1. Moving On

**Full Summary:**

Set after the Cullens left. Bella went on with her life as normally as she could, until someone from her tragic past returns. She soon finds herself in an unlikely friendship which helps her finally move on. What would happen when Bella, with a fully healed heart, crosses path once more with the one man who uncaringly left her behind? Would she be able to forgive him and leave the past behind? Or would she demonstrate the same courtesy he had coldly bestowed upon her?

**Hi guys! This is my first ever fanfic. I know this storyline had been done and used a lot of times before, but I hope you could still give it a chance. I'll try my best to update once a week. Thanks! :D**

**The characters belong to Stephenie Meyer.**

**BPOV**

_The forest is unusually still, no footsteps of grazing deer or elk could be heard. Even the chirping of the birds seemed to be silenced. I could only pick out the pattern of droplets of the slight drizzle making contact with the tree leaves and the ground._

_Well, that and the uneven thumping of my little heart._

_I knew that something was wrong. I knew it since he asked to "take a walk and speak with me" behind my house. I knew it since I met him this morning in the parking lot when I drove to school. I knew it since he drove me home after my catastrophic birthday party. I knew it since I first figured out what exactly he and his entire family really are. Hell, I knew it since the first time I laid eyes on him._

_He always thought of himself as a monster, someone who should have died decades ago, someone who didn't deserve to be alive anymore. Someone who didn't deserve to be loved in any way._

_I, on the other hand, only saw him as my knight in shining armor, my personal guardian angel. He never failed to save me whenever I stumble, or clumsily trip on my own two feet or over thin air. He even goes out of his way just to make me comfortable, even if it results to his own pain. He has always been there._

_But seeing the way our conversation was going, that's about to change._

"_What- what did you just say?" I managed choked out._

"_I said my family and I are going somewhere", he answered me with a flat voice, "and no, I'm not going to take you with me." I just gaped at him, unable to form a coherent sentence. "It's time for us to go, Bella. We can't stay here in Forks anymore. People will get suspicious." He was staring at me with his cold, unnerving eyes. That got me out of my stunned state._

"_Wait, no! You can leave next year, then I'll be out of high school and I can go with you. What's one more year?" I didn't realize that I was tearing up until the last sentence came out as a whine._

_He just shook his head and stared at me again. I realized that he wasn't going to speak so I pleaded one more time. "Please, Edward. You promised me back in Phoenix."_

_Again, he shook his head and turned his gaze somewhere past my head. "I promised that I will do what is best for you." His voice turned from flat to cold. My hope was starting to deteriorate, and so was my resolve not to cry. _

"_This isn't about your family getting exposed, is it? This is about what happened with Jasper, right?" I asked while trying my best not to wail like a damn baby. "What happened at the party was an accident, Edward. It can't be avoided and it's not like I-" "No, Bella." He cut me off with his cold, serious voice. "It can be avoided if you are with someone who's human and not after your blood every damn second you're with him." He turned around and continued speaking with his back to me. "I've let this go on for too long."_

_I opened my mouth but no sound came out. I tried again and again, probably looking like a goldfish in the process, until I was finally able to find my voice. "What are you saying?"_

_He turned around and met my gaze unblinkingly. Again with his icy tone, he finally broke my heart. "Bella, what I'm saying is that I don't want you anymore."_

_I was rendered speechless. I studied the creature in front of me. His eyes were cold, and his stance seemed impatient, almost looking annoyed._

_Then it hit me._

_Of course he's annoyed. He must be eager to get rid of the plain, clumsy human who he needed to take care of. He must be tired of saving my fragile ass all the time._

_With this realization, I struggled to compose myself, especially my tear-streaked face. I took a deep breath and exhaled a few seconds later before speaking. "Well, that changes things."_

_I could almost swear that I saw a pained expression on his face for a split second, but then again, it could only be my mind playing tricks on me. Showing me things my eyes wanted me to see._

_The silence dragged on until Edward spoke again. "Bella, can you promise me one thing?" When I nodded my head, he continued, "Now that I won't be here anymore, please take good care of yourself. For Charlie's sake, of course. You know he needs you."_

_I managed to nod my head again. He shifted on his foot and I reluctantly met his eyes again. After a few seconds of looking at each other's eyes, he spoke the words that served as nails to my coffin. "It's over, Bella. You will never be hurt because of me again. It will be like I never existed."_

_He kissed my forehead, and in a blink of an eye, he was gone._

_I tried to run blindly after him, but after tripping on a tree root, I gave up. I finally let all the emotions out and wept for my shattered world._

**

I woke up with a start, sweating and shaking. I clenched my fists, trying to beat the pain that was tearing my chest apart. After a few deep breaths, I finally managed to calm down my shaking body. Unfortunately, it also gave me the godforsaken opportunity to dwell on what I dreamt about. It was of that dreadful day when my whole world was shattered into pieces. It was the nightmare that has never failed to visit me every night. I felt nauseous and immediately ran to the bathroom I shared with my dad.

After flushing the toilet, I was immediately thankful that there were little rays of sunlight coming through the window, which means that Charlie had already left for work. I was spared from another "move on" sermon from my dad.

It has been months since they left Forks, since he left me. And still I couldn't let myself think of his name, let alone speak it out loud. For the first few months that they have moved out, I was pretty much useless. Aside from Charlie, I never spoke to anyone. I couldn't even remember what events took place during that time. It was like I zoned out for months. School, homework, cook dinner for Charlie. That was my routine, and it never changed. It never changed until Charlie put his foot down and presented me with his very first "move on or get help" speech.

Charlie demanded that if I continued on my "wallowing", it's either he would send me back to my mother and her new husband Phil, or he would have me seek professional help. Now, I cannot _not_ be in Forks. This is where I met him. This is where I first fell in love. And even if he didn't want me anymore and left me broken, I still feel the need to have a connection to him. I still feel the need to know that he existed. And Forks satiates those needs.

Going to a shrink, on the other hand, is absolutely out of the question. _My name's Bella, and my vampire boyfriend who refuses to drink human blood left me because I was causing him pain and he thought that breaking up with me was for the best. _Great, real smooth. I wonder how that would turn out.

So after a few months of grieving, and not to mention Charlie's lectures, I struggled to compose myself. I strived to reorganize my routine, making time for my friends and our "hang-out" sessions. But that didn't mean that I was healed. The nightmares still came to me every night, and I was still powerless to keep them at bay.

I strived to look alright in front of Charlie. Making one of his favorite dishes every once in a while, or engaging him in conversations about his interests, such as baseball and fishing, which I certainly know nothing about. Hell, I even try to smile or laugh every now and then, though it usually comes out forced or strained. And I think Charlie knew that. Sometimes I see him watching me from the corner of his eyes, gauging if I would crumble down again. If he really knew that something was up, he never tried to discuss it with me. Thank God for that. If it was because he sees my effort to finally "move on", or his aversion to female tears, or that he just simply gave up, I would never know.

My friends, of course, were a different story. There's Angela and her boyfriend Ben who stayed with me and reveled when I finally uttered my first words after emerging from my catatonic state. There's Eric and Tyler who continuously exert heroic efforts to make me laugh, or at least, prevent me from returning to my zombie-self. There's Jessica who felt that it was her job to update me with all the Forks gossip that I have missed when I was "hibernating" – not that I was ever interested in any of it. There's Lauren – I've never considered her as my friend but she hangs out with the same people that I hang out with, so to hell with it – who never fails to throw jibes in my direction regarding how I look or dress, as if her opinion would matter to me. I remember that she even once made fun of how I _breathe. _I mean, come on! Really?

And then, of course, there's Mike. When I resurfaced from my personal Dark Ages, he welcomed me back with arms wide open, literally. Like before, he still follows me wherever I go. He walks with me along the corridors of the school, bringing me to my next class, even though his was in a totally different building. He even goes as far as waiting promptly outside my last class, then walking me to my car. Sometimes I just can't help but feel smothered. I mean, it's not like aliens are going to land on this planet and specifically abduct me. But then again, with my marvelous luck, that's not too far off the mark.

Mike grabbed every opportunity to ask me out, much to Jess' dismay. And every time he asked me out, I turned him down, which brings me back to Jess' good side.

Hence, my little night out tonight.

I hurriedly took a shower, letting the hot water calm my still tense nerves. _Get a grip, idiot!,_ I thought to myself. _It's been five months, and it's not like he's still thinking about you. He's probably much more relaxed right now that he's miles away from you and your oh-so-irresistible blood. _I felt the familiar pain rising to my chest again and I decided to divert my thoughts to what I have to deal with tonight.

Mike persistently asked me to go to the movies with him. And since he was too dense to process the idea that I was not interested and never will be, I finally decided to yield, just to shut him up. I thought that maybe he would stop pestering me once I turn his "dream date" to "a date from hell with plain, boring Bella". I was already picking schemes on how to lightly piss him off during our date, not too much but enough to make him hesitate to ask me out again. But, maybe, my luck was beginning to change, because an easier solution came along. A solution named Jessica Stanley.

I grabbed my school bag and descended the stairs slowly – no need to tempt fate. I snatched an oatmeal bar from the kitchen counter and headed outside to my truck. As I was driving to school, I can't help but snort at what I had spontaneously arranged yesterday.

"_Hey, Bells! So what's up?", Mike asked me as soon as I stepped out of my class, as if he hadn't seen me just an hour ago. I just shrugged my shoulders and continued walking to the cafeteria. Mike walked beside me, and the minute we fell in line to purchase our lunch, he vocalized the most dreaded statement of all. "So tomorrow's Friday night and the movie I've been waiting finally comes out. Um, I was wondering if you wanted to come to Port Angeles and watch it with me." I turned to face him and almost said my habitual 'No, Mike, I can't', but instead opted to seriously think about it. Maybe I really need to go out a little more. Not necessarily with Mike "the guard dog" Newton, but, he was the first one who asked, so to hell with it. I mean, it's just one date. How bad can that be?_

_I noticed that Mike's face grew hopeful when I didn't automatically turn his invitation down. "Yeah, sure, Mike. That sounds fun.", I replied flatly while I grabbed a slice of pizza and a bottle of water. Mike remained quiet, and after a few more seconds of silence, I looked up at him. He was staring at me with wide eyes._

"_You okay?", I asked him when we finally reached our usual lunch table. "Uh, yeah. I- well- you never- you always turned me down.", he finally stuttered out. A part of me felt a little pity for him, but then again, he _is _Mike Newton, the very guy who may consciously or unconsciously- but never fails to- invade my private space. "You know for a second there, I thought you were going to say no again.", he chuckled. _Oh boy, you have no idea, _I thought to myself._

_Before I could say anything else, Mike had regained his posture, and not to mention his self-confidence. He started to bombard me with his plans for tomorrow night. "So, maybe we could go to dinner after the movie. Where would you like to eat? Or maybe we could eat before the movie? I could pick you up a little earlier than planned. The Italian restaurant really has the best steak, and their Pesto really- "._

_I zoned out after that. The Italian restaurant? In Port Angeles? Could Mike be talking about the _very _restaurant Ed- _he _took me to after he saved me from those frat boys months ago? The _very same_ restaurant where I figured out his deepest secrets? Oh hell no! This can't be happening. Please, I take it back! Yes, it's just one date. And it can be _that_ bad._

_Mike must have noticed that I was out of it, so he nudged me softly with his elbow. "So, what do you think? I mean if you don't dig it we could always-" I raised a hand to stop him. "Mike, listen. I think you-", I started, but was cut off by Jessica who was skipping towards our table "How ya doing, peeps?" God bless Jess and her impeccable timing._

_She sat herself on my other side. I threw a little smile at her direction, while Mike barely acknowledged her presence. As I also nodded to Angela, Ben and Eric who were now sitting across from us, I noticed that Tyler and Lauren were already seated on the other end of the table. _Great, _I thought dryly, _we can get the party started now that the whole gang's here._ I sincerely wished that Mike would keep his mouth shut about tomorrow night, but then again, knowing Mike, I knew that it was too much to ask._

"_Bella and I are going to Port Angeles tomorrow night to see the movie that I've been telling you about.", Mike said with a smug smile. Well, there goes my wish. I felt Jessica tense beside me, as our usually loud lunch table suddenly became quiet except for the sound of a piece of cutlery falling to floor and someone coughing violently. I could almost swear I could hear crickets. I looked around the table, and almost laughed out loud to my friends' comical faces._

_Angela was staring at her plate, while Ben was scratching his head, both of them were wearing matching furrowed brows. Eric's right hand, which was holding an apple, was inches from his still wide open mouth. Tyler was covering is mouth while he coughed his heart out and Lauren stared at me with a raised eyebrow._

Huh, I never thought I had the extraordinary capability to shut _these___people up, _I chuckled to myself. _I've always thought that no one was that powerful.

"_Really? Well that's something new." Jess grunted, finally breaking the unnatural silence. I glanced at her direction and sensed that she was really upset about the fact that Mike asked me out, practically ignoring her flirtations in the process. I guess I underestimated her feelings towards him all this time. Maybe she really does like him a lot. And Mike was too busy hovering over me to notice her. _So I guess it's up to me to change that., _I resolved to myself._

"_Of course, Jess!", I turned to face her. "I realized that I've neglected my friends too much in the past. I just want to make it up you guys. I was thinking, maybe we could all hang out tomorrow night. Only if you don't have any plans." I smiled timidly at her, while Mike started to protest. "Bella, I mean-", he stammered, but his voice was drowned out by Jessica's shriek. "Are you kidding me, Bella?! Of course we'll go out tomorrow! Ooh, we are going to have so much fun." She rattled on and on, while the others managed to butt in their agreements._

_I peeked at Mike, measuring his reaction. I was glad when he remained silent and didn't attempt to set the record straight about our supposed to be exclusive date. _I guess I'll have to send a thank you note to his parents for instilling some gentlemanly values in him.

_Finally, the bell rang and we stood up to proceed to our respective classes. Mike walked with me, still looking like someone kicked his puppy. My guilt genes were starting to act up, so I swiftly bumped his shoulder. "Hey, sorry about that. But you can't deny that I have really been ignoring you, all of you, these past few months." He nodded with a shadow of a sad smile but didn't say anything. "Mike, you're a really great guy, but I think we just aren't going to work. I'm not ready for that." I really hoped he understood what I was saying. "Fine, Bells. I'll stop.", he sighed and then chuckled, "I'll still be your friend though. You won't get rid of me that easily." I lightly punched his arm and thanked him seriously._

_I was about to enter the room when a thought suddenly came into my mind. "Hey!", I called to him and he eagerly turned around to face me again. "Keep your eyes open. You know, try to be more attentive to everyone around you. You might find that you may have been unknowingly ignoring what you're looking for all along." I could only pray that my cryptic message would keep his brain working, enough to divert his thoughts from the reality that I have rejected him again for the hundredth time._

_Mike started to say something, but I just raised my hand to stop him again. "Just think about what I said, okay?" He nodded and waved goodbye before jogging off to his next class, which was in a different building. I took my usual seat and shook my head. _Just because my heart is screwed beyond repair doesn't mean that my friends have to suffer along with me., _I concluded firmly to myself._

I parked my ever noisy vehicle, and noticed that Tyler's truck was already parked across the lot, with him, Lauren, Mike and Jess lolling around beside it. It was the replacement vehicle that his parents had granted him. I shuddered once I relived the unspeakable incident, the phenomenon which provided me my very first concrete evidence that Ed- _he _was, indeed, supernatural.

I remembered that Tyler's mini van was so distorted that his parents just opted to sell it to the junk shop, simply because it would be cheaper to buy another second hand car, rather than get the devastated van fixed. Damn it, if I wasn't saved by a certain someone who happened to be impossibly fast and strong, I would have suffered the same, if not worse, fate as the ruined mini van.

I shook my head to clear the horrible thoughts away. I carefully got out of my truck and immediately got assaulted by Jessica's screech. "Bella! What's taking you so long? Get your ass over here already!" I winced internally, and tried to walk faster to pacify my friend's loud mouth. As I stumbled my way to them, almost slipping once on a smooth patch of ice, Jessica continued to drone on about, no doubt, what would be happening tonight.

"Hello! Earth to Isabella Marie Swan. Have you been listening to what I was saying?" Jess sighed dramatically. I was looking down while I was walking, watching my feet cautiously to avoid any more mishaps, so logically, I wasn't really paying attention to her.

"Um, what was that again?", I asked her sheepishly. Jess placed the back of her hand on her forehead and groaned. "Geez, Bella. What are we ever going to do with you?", she said theatrically, causing the Mike and Tyler to laugh. I was thinking of something witty to respond to her when Lauren finally decided to put her two cents in. "Oh come on, give her a break, guys. She was busy trying to avoid another encounter with her friend named Mr. Ground."

The boys instantly shut up and we all turned to face Lauren. She was studying her nails as if it held the answer as to why the sun was the center of the solar system. Okay, who is this creature standing before us, and what have she done with Lauren the bitch? I mean, seriously, if Lauren was actually _defending_ me, then something's definitely not right.

Lauren finally looked up to see us all gawking at her. "What?", she asked exasperatedly. "Bella was obviously on guard, looking out for her fat ass, since Prince Charming bailed out on her." _Oh look, there's the Lauren we all know and love_., I thought sarcastically. I wanted to rip her hair out right then and there, but since I wasn't really a violent person, I eventually decided to just ignore her. Besides, I thought Charlie won't be able to live past the notion of arresting his only daughter.

But the damage has been done. The tension between all of us was so thick it could be cut with a knife. For the second time that day, I was overwhelmed by the thoughts of the man who smoothly rescued me whenever my clumsiness attempts to display itself. The same man who's the reason as to why I was still standing in this parking lot, physically intact, unlike Tyler's mini van._ Great, that's twice now Bella., _I mentally scolded myself_. And your classes haven't even started yet._

I saw Tyler elbow Lauren slightly, trying to make her apologize. I knew that she would rather eat dirt than apologize to _me, _and I couldn't care less. Jessica cleared her throat, and once again I found myself thanking her and her superb timing. "So Bella, as I was saying, we would be taking two cars later and we'll all meet up at the Newtons' store at five. Got it?" I was still a little disoriented, so I asked without thinking, "Why two cars?" She playfully slapped my arm. "Silly, Bella. We are taking two cars because we all couldn't fit in just one. There's eight of us. Me, you, Mike, Ange, Ben, Lauren, Tyler and Eric." She explained like she was talking to a toddler, even making me watch as she counted off on her fingers. "You and the girls will be riding with me and the guys will ride with Tyler.", she continued.

Wait, what?! Did she just say that I will be stuck in her car with Lauren for the whole ride to and from Port Angeles? Well that's just freakin' fantastic. Lauren, combined with Jessica's ability to chatter endlessly will be unbearable as it is. And if we're riding in Jess' car, I might as well brace myself for the craptastic pop songs she always played in her stereo. Thank the heavens I'd have Angela to keep me sane.

The bell finally rang and we all walked to our classes. Instead of walking beside me, I noticed that Mike stopped in his tracks. He faced me and scratched his temple. "So I take it you wouldn't want me to walk you to your class?", he asked me with a shy smile. I grinned at him, thankful that he finally got what I was saying. "Thanks, Mike. I really appreciate that, you know?" "Yeah, yeah.", he laughed, "See you later, Bells!", and with a wave he jogged off to the opposite direction.

I made it to my room unharmed. While I waited for teacher to grace us with his presence, I thought over a few things. I was greatly appreciative of Mike's actions to discontinue his hovering over me, and the fact that we're still good friends despite the actuality that I've rejected him so many times. On the other hand, I was dreading the car ride to Port Angeles. A prickly Lauren, a blabbering Jessica and a collection of ear-shattering bubble gum songs are not I want to get stuck with. Damn, what have I gotten myself into?

**Reviews will be deeply appreciated! :)**


	2. Another Day In Hell

**A very big THANKS to Bee93! You will always be my first reviewer :D**

**Again, the **_**Twilight**_** characters are Stephenie Meyers', not mine.**

**And Mariah Carey is definitely not mine either ;p**

**BPOV**

To say that school today is bad is such an understatement.

Today was calamitous. It's horribly tragic.

After my bumpy moments with Lauren at the parking lot this morning, I thought the worse was over and I can boldly face the thorns this day will throw my way. Oh boy, I was so dead wrong.

First, my English professor made us write our thoughts on _Romeo and Juliet _and what we think they could have done to "save" their doomed romance. As expected, I came up blank. I mean, I wasn't able to find a solution to my _own _doomed romance, so how I will be able to throw a suggestion that would eventually result to positive outcomes is undeniably out of the question. At about ten minutes before our papers were due, mine was still as clean and untouched as the day it was created from an unfortunate tree. At the last minute, I decided to just write what I felt. After all, submitting a full-page of honestly written pessimistic and slightly morbid thoughts is always better than submitting a blank one, right? I just yakked on about taking everything as it is; that maybe Romeo and Juliet, try as they may, cannot do anything to save their relationship simply because it's just _destined_ to fail. I even added a little note saying that if I would be given the blessed opportunity to meet Shakespeare in the afterlife, I would ask him what the hell he was thinking when he wrote a story about the glory, splendor and magnificence of true love, only to have them die at the end because of it. And not to mention, terribly breaking the readers' hearts. My ever-buoyant professor would surely shit bricks. It would surely surprise him that the well-behaved daughter of the town's chief-of-police could come up with not-so-sanguine views. _I'll have to ready myself for my first _F, I thought indifferently.

In my Trigonometry class, the teacher called on me to give the correct answer when I wasn't paying attention. He called on me, not one, not twice, but thrice. As in three effin' times. I mean, seriously, can't he simply process the fact that I'm in no mood to listen to his monologue about tangents and move on to his other unsuspecting victims, namely my other classmates who were ducking their heads in order to avoid any eye contact with him? And to make matters worse, I was completely feeble since I left my trustworthy scientific calculator on my study table at home. He shook his head to me grumpily, but decided that he would be _lenient _today- his words, not mine. He warned me and the whole class never come to Trigonometry lessons unarmed, well in this case, calculator-less. I, on the other hand, was just relieved that he didn't condemn me to detention. Huh, that would've been a first. _And if that happens, it would be _Charlie_ who would shit bricks., _I chuckled to myself humorlessly. I suppose high grades and clean records go a long way with professors.

Then in my History class, I was called to the front of the room to discuss the role of powerful couples in shaping history as it came to be. I ranted mindlessly about Ceasar's "love" for Cleopatra that he willingly allowed her to keep her own dynasty instead of conquering her land, but apparent it still wasn't enough because he was unable to marry her even if his own wife and family had been knowledgeable about their affair. I also extensively discussed King Henry VIII's supposed "love" for Catherine of Aragorn, his first wife, that he saved her from disgrace when her husband, his brother and rightful king, suddenly dies, only to have her banished when a fresh piece of meat came along. I spoke heatedly as well about his "love" for Anne Boleyn, the fresh piece of meat and his second wife, that he changed a whole religion just to marry her and make her his new queen, only to have her beheaded when she failed to provide him a son and heir to his throne. I briefly discussed his succeeding marriages to different women, four to be exact, which all ended in either death or banishment. Hell, I think I even mentioned Adam and Eve, their perfect world, and how quick it was for him to point his finger at her when they were about to be evicted from the Garden of Eden.

When I finished my tirade, the class was totally silent. I was surprised to see that my classmates were gawking at me with eyes as wide as saucers. Most of them also had their mouths hanging open. Even the teacher was slack-jawed. He eventually cleared his throat and finally asked me to take my seat again. "Uh, you have quite interesting points, Miss Swan.", he stammered out after I was seated. I was sure my face was turning an unhealthy shade of scarlet as I realized that I may have said too much, and my classmates were all very aware of what, or _who_, may have been the cause of my outburst. Thankfully, the bell signaling for lunch came on and I hurried out to the bathroom to splash some cold water to my burning face.

After a few deep breaths, I was a lot calmer and my face was not as hot as before. I glanced at the mirror and saw that the red had indeed subsided and my face was almost back to its pale shade. _I really got to hand it to you.,_ I mockingly thought to my reflection. _Just when you thought you were so screwed beyond recognition, you had to step up the game and screw yourself even further._ Wow, I should be in the Guinness Book of World Records, the title holder for _messing up her whole life single-handedly over and over again_. My name would be there for a long time, since I doubt that anyone can top me and my remarkable performance. Of course! I mean, I put the "ass" in embarrassment. Without a doubt, I can never walk in that room again without my face burning red.

I swaggered out of the bathroom and walked along the empty corridor. Everyone's now in the cafeteria, and my impromptu flared-up speech could now be topic of discussions. I tried to push this thought at the back of my mind, because if I didn't, I will never have the muscle to enter that damn room.

Sure enough, as soon as I stepped inside, hushed whispers could be heard from anywhere and everywhere. Thankfully, there were no more students at the lunch line so I managed to grab a bottle of water and quickly head down to my friends' table.

I sat beside Angela, and she instantly threw me a worried glance. "Are you alright, Bells? We, uh, we heard what happened.". She was studying my face, so I just nodded my head. "I'm fine, Ange. I think I'll survive.", I uttered jokingly. Angela can read me easily, and right now, she definitely knows that I'm everything _but_ fine. But like Charlie, she never hovered over me so she just nodded back to me and dropped the subject. But then again, Lauren had other ideas. "So I heard it was the most interesting English class that Forks High had in ages. Any chance of a repeat performance?", she was smiling sweetly at me, as if she was telling me an effin' compliment. I just rolled my eyes at her and uncapped my bottle of water. I drank heartily, suddenly thirsty. "Don't get your hopes up.", I muttered to the table while twisting the cap back on the bottle. "Sheesh! Thank God for that!", Jess exhaled loudly while making a show of wiping imaginary sweat off her forehead. Everyone at the table laughed, and even I chuckled at her. Gotta love Jessica freakin' Stanley. Yes, she may not be the most mature person to share serious conversations with, but she definitely knows how to ward off tense situations.

"You're not going to eat, Bella?", Eric asked, pointing to my half empty bottle of water. He was sitting directly across from me, so he pushed his plate of fries towards me and told me to get some. "No, I really don't have an appetite today. Thanks, Eric." He just shrugged his shoulders and took his plate back.

"Hey, you're not gonna bail out on us tonight, are you?", Tyler asked me while munching on his cheese stick. Before I could answer him, I heard groans and whines from everyone around the table- well, from everyone except Lauren, that is. I looked at my friends and just like at lunch yesterday, I was greeted by a hodgepodge of comical faces. Angela looked worried, and Ben was frowning at me. Jessica was pouting and putting on her best sad puppy look while Mike was staring at me with his cheeks bloated, his mouth filled with a bite of the cheeseburger he was currently devouring. Eric was staring at me while trying to dip his fry into a pool of ketchup, but missing it by a few inches. Tyler was still munching on his cheese stick, unconsciously squeezing it too tight that melted cheese oozed from the bottom and landed on his navy blue shirt. And Lauren, well, Lauren was studying her nails.

I laughed silently and shook my head. "I said I didn't have an appetite for lunch. I never said anything about bailing out tonight." I took another drink from my bottle and heard Jess squeal and clap her hands. The others released a collective sigh and continued eating. I heard a faint snort from Lauren, but a quick look at her told me she was smiling a little as well. And it wasn't a sneer or anything close to it which can be automatically expected from her. It was a hint of a _genuine_ smile.

Huh, Lauren. Is. Smiling. Sincerely. Well, that's surprising. "Sheesh! Thank God for that!" Ben imitated Jess' theatrics earlier which caused us all to laugh, and Jess stealing a fry from Eric's plate to throw at Ben.

After a few more minutes, the bell rang and we hurriedly walked to our respective classrooms. I wobbled my way to my Physics class, and slumped down on my seat. Just like in Biology class last year, the teacher had us in pairs and we'll have to share a table with our lab partner. When classes began, nobody was surprised when I had inherited my _former Biology lab partner_ as my new Physics lab partner. And when _that _student, along with his pixie-like sister who eventually became my best friend and their whole impossibly beautiful family, moved away from Forks a couple of weeks later, no one really had the guts to take his position.

_Damn it, Bella! You're stepping on dangerous grounds for the millionth time today._

I looked back at my friends' hilarious faces during lunch in order to prevent myself from crying my eyes out. In the middle of Physics class, no less. It may seem that I hang out with my friends just to pass the time and get Charlie off my back. Honestly speaking, that is not the case. I was, and still am, very much grateful that I have people like them to make my agonizing days bearable. I can't help but compare them to one of those boxes of assorted chocolates; some are extra milky, some are _too_ sweet, some are bitter, and some are just the right combination of richness and texture. They are merry and outgoing people, and they offer spontaneity that introverts like me categorically needs. And when things go far too crazy or out of hand, I could always turn to Angela to bring me back to my senses. I can't even bring myself to dare to imagine what I would be like right now if they _also_ turned their backs to me when I was floundering around with my devastatingly broken self. I mean, to give your whole heart away to someone, and have the rug under you pulled by _that _certain someone coldly, no pun intended, aren't atrocious enough, suffering through those _alone _will surely be worse than hell. I know, I know. I'm kind of the more suffer-in-silence type, but it certainly doesn't hurt to have shoulders to lean on when things go too excruciatingly bad.

I almost jumped when the bell rang again. The hour flew by just like that and I didn't even hear a word spoken in class. But then again, being the studious human being that I am, I always read chapters ahead so that won't be a problem, not to sound cocky or anything. I guess I'll just have to ask one of my classmates if the teacher gave us any assignments.

It turned out that the teacher only reminded us of our paper being due next week, which of course I had already finished writing last weekend, and he didn't leave us any homework as his "gift" to us. I trudged out of the building and was greeted by the soft afternoon drizzle. I pondered on the gift comment for a while but decided to just disregard it. I entered the gym and instantly groaned when I saw that the school crew chose to take down the usual and uniform window blinds and put up red silk and satin curtains instead. Damn, why do they bother with this stuff? It's not like students come here to admire their decorations, it's more like we come here to sweat our bums off and pass another compulsory class.

Geez, I abhor Gym. And that is one way of putting it lightly. If I was born a little more hard core, that statement would come with a set of colorful expletives that will put any sailor stuck in the ocean for decades to shame. For someone as physically uncoordinated as me, Gym classes are the literal hell of every high school. My face was always burning red hot that others can swear they would be able to fry an egg on it. As if bruising myself or landing flat on my ass aren't awful enough, I, most of the time, cause injuries to my unfortunate classmates and to the other gym class that we shared the venue with as well. I once single-handedly managed to end our class half an hour before the bell rang by playing volleyball, and in the process, bestowing a concussion, a bloody lip, couple of sprained ankles, an unhealthy amount of scraped elbows and knees and a generous number of bruises upon my unlucky classmates. I could also conclude that I left our Gym teacher with a throbbing migraine.

Gratefully, we now moved on to table tennis. I was relieved that we were now dealing with a sport that is not as action-packed as the usual. I mean, now, the ball was as almost as light as a feather and all you have to do is run around the freakin' table to deflect it with a small paddle. I wouldn't mess up something as easy as that, right?

Wrong! Being Bella Swan for the past eighteen years, I should have known that can I mess _anything_ up. The ball is indeed light, thus making it faster than I can follow it with my eyes, and my sorry excuse for hand-and-eye coordination didn't help any. The paddle is indeed small, but it was made of rubber and wood, thus making it heavy. As I swung my right arm to hit the ball, I realized that I underestimated my grip on the paddle, but it was too late. It flew out from my hand and went sailing into the air, then smacked the left arm of the boy who was playing beside our table. He just smiled sadly at me and waved a hand to brush off my apology. He was either already expecting that something like this would happen since he was standing just a few feet away from me, or that he's thankful that he was able to survive with just a bruised arm, rather than to be carried out on a stretcher.

And of course, my day wouldn't be complete if I didn't gain any battle wound. The table, like any other rectangular tables, had corners. Sharp, pointy effin' corners. As I ran to the other end of my side to strike the miniature ball, the corner of the table poked a part of my hip. I tried to ignore the little pain, but it happened again. _Twice_, might I add? That effin' corner poked the same spot on my hip thrice. I can just picture the big ugly bruise already starting to form there. But then again, nothing surprising there. The bruises and my body are like peanut butter and jelly. It's like the two should _never_ be separated. If I was given a dollar for every physical misfortune that I have acquired since the day I was born, I could possibly be one of the richest people in the state of Washington.

Gym class ended without any more injury. I headed to the locker room to change and tried my best to ignore the other girls who were excitedly talking about something being "new". I exited the gym and headed back to the parking lot, eager to get to my homey truck. On my way there, I passed by Tyler's and saw that the whole gang gathered there. They waved me over and when I was near enough, Tyler shoved a jar of Red Vines candy at me, knowing fully that it was my favorite. The main reason why we opted to hang out by his vehicle is that his truck, like his previous van, is always fully loaded with sweets and goodies. It's like he never runs out of it. The others always teased him that if he maximized his truck and used its bed as a candy store, he could make a fortune. He always declined the idea and stated that his candies are "exclusively for him and his people alone".

"Did you already tell Charlie that we're going out tonight?", Jessica asked me while sucking on a lollipop. "Yeah, I told him last night", I nodded, "but it might have slipped his mind so I'll just leave him a note or something." From the corner of my eye, I saw Lauren nod as well. "Good. At least we all won't face a Spanish Inquisition, Chief-of-Police style.", she said in a tone I hadn't heard her use on me before. It wasn't a scoff or a sneer. Her tone was _normal_. I looked at her momentarily, and then looked at my friends. They didn't seem to notice anything. I just nodded my head again, still a little confused.

"Bells, I'm going to pick up Ange later. Around ten minutes before five. Want us to pick you up as well? Your house won't really be out of the way anyway.", Ben asked while I chomped down my second Red Vine. "Yup. That sounds good.", I agreed. Really, there's no reason for us to crowd the parking space of the Newton's Store with our cars, especially if we're not going to be there in the first place anyway.

I listened to my friends' chatter for a while before I went to my truck. "I gotta go. I'll have to make Charlie his dinner before we leave." I grabbed two more Red Vines and handed the jar back to Tyler. "Don't forget, Bella!", Jess shouted as I walked away, "We'll be leaving at _five_!" I didn't turn around but gave her a thumbs-up sign, never taking my eyes off the ground. I heard my friends' laughter as I drove away.

I parked my truck in front of our house, and my eyes immediately darted to the path that leads to the woods. The woods where _he_ revealed that everything I believed in was basically a lie. We, what we shared between us, had just been a lie; just another one of the many distractions he needed in his timeless existence. With the realization that everything between us has gone far too complicated to handle, he moved himself and his family away. Losing the man I love is agonizing, and losing the people that I have come to love as a second family on the same occasion is like pouring salt to my open wounds. I guess I can say that I would take the excruciating pain of James' venom any day, rather than experience that dreadful event ever again.

I got hold of myself before the tears on my eyes fell. I took a deep breath and cut the engine which was still idling noisily. _Good thing Charlie isn't here yet_., I thought, _he'll definitely know you were taking a walk down the damned memory lane again._

I got out of the truck and walked carefully to the front door, still taking deep breaths. By the time I got to the kitchen, I had regained my composure. Well, as composed as I'll ever be. I checked the cupboards and the fridge, looking for something I could cook quickly. I decided to make simple spaghetti and meatballs and some garlic bread to come with it. I also made a mental note to visit the grocery store tomorrow.

I got to work and finished in no time. I set the bowl at the table, waiting the food to cool down before putting it in the fridge. I washed the utensils using the new dishwasher Charlie had bought, remembering his face when he first showed it to me when I came home from school one day. He'd said, and I quote, "I guess it's time for me to help out in the kitchen, so, erm, I bought a dishwasher. The saleslady picked that one out. She said it's easy to operate and really _durable_." I can't help but smile at my father's dry sense of humor. By "help out", he didn't mean that he himself would actually work. What he meant was purchasing a machine that would make _me_ accomplish _my tasks_ faster. To top that off, he had to get a "really durable" one that could hopefully survive encounters with me and my not-so-graceful ways.

I dried off my hands and noticed that the living room could use some tidying up. After arranging Charlie's newspapers into a neat stack, everything was in its rightful place. The couch looks ready to welcome Charlie's weight, the coffee table looks spotless clean, and so does the flatscreen TV. The three material things Charlie couldn't live without, aside from his shotgun and pistol, that is. He would no doubt eat in here, because aside from the fact that he'll be eating alone, there'll be some "awesome" baseball game airing tonight.

I reined in my Obsessive-Compulsive self and decided to take a short shower. A glance at the clock told me that Ben and Angela will be picking me up in half an hour so I have enough time to spare. I went back to the kitchen and put the bowl of spaghetti in the fridge. I retrieved my backpack from one of the chairs where I unceremoniously dumped it earlier and headed up to my room.

I dropped my keys to my bedside table and deposited my bag to its designated spot on the chair facing my study table. I grabbed my small leather Gucci tote bag that Renee had given me for Christmas last year. I never wanted to use it because it's a designer and really expensive, but I didn't have a choice since it was the smallest bag I own. Just like before, my parents and Phil decided to nonchalantly ignore my aversion to receiving expensive gifts, expensive being the key word there. I have learned before that no storm can ever stop them from throwing gifts my way so I simply dealt with it and graciously thanked them. But receiving gifts is one thing, and receiving _pricey_ ones is another.

Last Christmas, Renee and Phil came to Forks to spend time with us. Surprisingly, spending time together with my father, my mother and her new husband isn't as awkward as I thought it would be, or at least that's what I think when I look back into it.

At that time I was so out of it that I don't even remember what I had prepared for our Christmas dinner. It was like my body was on autopilot. I didn't have the sense or the energy to bitch around when I discovered my mom gave me the designer bag, or when I opened my gift from Phil and saw that he got me the latest model of cell phone which had a radio, a camera and built-in Wi-Fi on it. Hell, I didn't even throw a fit when I laid my eyes on Charlie's gift for me, and it was a new Mac laptop. Instead, I thanked them using a soft and calm voice, the exact opposite of the tantrums they were expecting. By the looks on their faces, they didn't know if they should be happy that I gratefully accepted their gifts for me without freaking out on them, or they should be worried that there is certainly something wrong.

I grabbed the phone from my back pocket and threw it in the ridiculously expensive tote. I also put in my wallet and set of keys before zipping it close. I headed to the bathroom down the hall with my toiletries at hand and took a second shower for the day.

After showering, I threw on a pair of dark skinny jeans and a long-sleeved green shirt that Jessica had blackmailed me into buying when we went out shopping in Port Angeles. She had insisted something about it being perfect for me, and since she wouldn't let it go, I bought the freakin' shirt just to shut her up. I decided to just let my hair dry naturally as I laced on my black Chucks. I took my favorite black hoodie- which was two sizes too large for me, much to Jess' dismay- from my closet and snatched the tote from the bed before going downstairs. I left Charlie a note on the fridge, reminding him of my plans for tonight, and telling him to just reheat the spaghetti I made and that the garlic bread was in the oven. I glanced at the clock again and saw that it was already quarter to five. Sure enough, not even five minutes later, I heard a car pull up.

I went outside and locked the door. When I slid myself in Ben's backseat, I was greeted by his and Angela's matching grinning faces. "Ready to party, Bells? We are gonna have fun tonight!", Ben asked while he drove, still grinning. I smiled back at him through the rearview mirror. I like Ben as much as I like Angela. They really made a great couple. "Shut it, Ben.", I joked, "You're beginning to sound like Jess." Angela giggled at my remark. Ben, with his blessed sense of humor, whined as if I had hurt his feelings. "Oh no, I do not!", he shrieked, perfectly imitating Jess' whiny defensive voice, which made me truly laugh.

Angela and I regained our bearings as we parked in front of the store. We saw that Jessica's car was already parked beside Tyler's truck. With Jess picking Lauren up from her house, Eric riding with Tyler, and Mike waiting for us in their store, we were the last group to arrive. We got out of Ben's car and walked to the door which Eric held open for us.

"What took you guys so long? I was just a second away from calling you, Bella. I thought you were going to back out or something. Really, I should have picked you…", She trailed off while Ben, Ange and I began chuckling, remembering Ben's uncanny imitation of her voice. "And what is so funny? Care to share it with us?", she inquired grouchily, both hands on her hips.

Knowing Ben, he'll more of _show _to the gang what's funny, instead of just _tell. _And with Jess' already grumpy mood because of our _tardiness_, we'll never hear the end of it. I hurriedly spoke before Ben could open his mouth. "I already told you at lunch that I'm not backing out. And besides, you said five, and we still had two minutes to spare. So hold your horses."

Jessica was still frowning, but she dropped the subject nonetheless. From the corner of my eye, I saw Ben was still stifling a laugh, which surely caused Ange to hit him lightly on the arm. _Yeah, Ben can amuse us some other time._

I noticed that, like me, my friends also took the time to freshen up themselves. They are now wearing different clothes from the ones they used earlier today at school. I particularly noted that Tyler was no longer wearing the navy blue shirt with the cheese stains, and that Jessica was wearing the pink blouse which, according to her, "makes her boobs look good".

I raised an eyebrow at her when she met my eye again. She just giggled and winked back at me, her bad mood evaporating into thin air. "Come on guys, can we please get going, as in right now?" Lauren huffed as she started to stalk towards the door. We followed her outside, and I was a little puzzled when she went directly to Tyler's truck. _Huh, I guess fate decided to spare me this time._

I slid in the backseat behind Jessica as she started her car and Angela seated herself beside me. Lauren walked towards our direction, her arms hugging something I couldn't make out clearly. _Duh, of course fate wouldn't spare me. That is just plainly impossible. _I fixed my gaze on the cluster of trees from across the street, their leaves dancing lightly due to the soft winds. How could something so peaceful and harmless star in my nightmare every night? Uh, well, I can actually think of a few explanations for that.

But I'm not going to go there.

I _refuse_ to go there.

This night is for my friends, and I will not let anything ruin it for them, for us. I promised myself that I will do my best to enjoy this night no matter what. I owe this to them.

"Bella." I was brought out from my internal monologue by Lauren. I turned to look at her in the passenger seat, gauging what she wanted from me. After a couple of seconds just staring at each other, she finally rolled her eyes at me. "Just take it. I didn't mess with it or whatever. Took it from Tyler, didn't give him a chance to bitch about it."

It was then that I noticed that she was holding out the jar of Red Vines to me. So she fetched my favorite sweet for me? Wow, from Lauren, that is a really _big_ thing, and not to mention _puzzling_. Jessica giggled as she pulled out from the store's parking lot. "Um, thanks." I took the jar from her awkwardly, as she turned to browse through a couple of Jess' CD's and eventually shoved one in the stereo. I looked at Angela quizzically, only to be greeted by a small, knowing smile.

_Okay, this day is turning from hellish to baffling, and come to think about it, our night has just begun._

Ange and I chewed on our Red Vines, while the dynamic duo in front of us sang their poor lungs out. Jess and Lauren belted out their ghastly version of Mariah Carey's already-eardrum-shattering song, _Heartbreaker_.

_Boy your love's so good  
I don't wanna let go  
And although I should  
I can't leave you alone  
Cause you're so disarming  
I'm caught up in the midst of you  
And I cannot resist at all  
Boy if I do  
The things you wanna to  
The way I used to do  
Could you love me baby  
You leave me feelin' used  
Cause you go and break my heart_

I cringed visibly as they reached a painfully high note. On my right, Angela was sagged down on her seat, her right hand nursing her temple. We were most probably sporting identical headaches. Little did I know that the worst is yet to come.

And it came in the form of the chorus.

_Heartbreaker, you've got the best of me  
But I just keep on comin' back incessantly  
Oh why did you have to run your game on me  
I should have known right from the start_

_You'd go and break my heart  
_

The chorus hit me. Hard. Especially the last two lines. I could almost swear this song was written for me.

_Yeah, it never made sense for him to love me._

_He_ was insanely beautiful, bequeathed with flawless poise and elegance, and gifted with phenomenal abilities.

_I,_ on the other hand, was a plain human who couldn't even walk gracefully to save her life.

I plucked another candy from the jar which was settled between Ange and I. I opted to chew it steadily, buying myself some deep breaths so I wouldn't bawl out. I pushed the thoughts out from my head, keeping good on my promise to not letting anything ruin tonight. And I mean a_nything._

Still, amidst my greatest efforts, the last lines of the chorus kept coming back to me, as if mocking me for my naivety.

_I should have known right from the start_

_You'd go and break my heart  
_

I don't know if I wanted to give Mariah a hug for identifying my feelings so spot-on, or give her a lovely kick on her portly booty for rubbing it on my face further. I was more inclined on the latter.

In fact, I even want to give her a resounding slap to go with it.

_What? Someone once taught me to do things _thoroughly_. I'm just putting into practice what I've learned._

Surely, I couldn't be blamed for that now…

Could I?

**Reviews? Anyone? Thanks :D**


	3. The Night Out

**Again, Twilight characters are not mine. Sorry this chapter's a little longer than the usual. I just couldn't stop writing.**

**Feel free to review :)**

**BPOV**

I miss Phoenix. I miss the sun, the scorching heat. I miss the house I lived in with my mother before she and Phil moved to Jacksonville and I to Forks. I miss my old room and everything in it. I miss my old comfy clothes.

Especially the ones I loved to wear which makes Renee want to tear her hair off.

I almost laughed out loud when I remembered her expressions every time she reads the prints on the shirts.

I had a dark green one that says _No Moore Mandy_.

I also had a maroon one which read _Jess-sucker Simpson_.

But my favorite was the black one which had _Spear Britney!_ in block yellow letters written across the chest.

Renee often complained that the shirts were angsty and offensive, but I merely saw it as a simple way of self-expression. The end of those of discussions never saw the light of day. Especially with Phil being too amused to break our arguments off.

Yeah, I'm not a popstar fan. The total opposite of Jess and Lauren who, I bet, knew every sickeningly poppy song to every crappy album of every bubblegum artist.

"We're almost there.", Angela murmured quietly. I didn't know if she was sort of assuring me, or she was comforting herself.

Sure enough, a couple of minutes later, Jess parked the car and we stepped out, stretching our almost numb legs after sitting for so long. Tyler parked his truck on an empty space two cars away.

As soon as she saw them step out of the vehicle, Angela ran towards the guys and securely fastened herself to Ben. who grasped her waist with his left arm in return.

I couldn't blame her. Driving to Port Angeles with two battling –and shrieking- karaoke queens and an emotionally unstable seatmate must have really taken its toll on her.

And besides, I think this was the longest time she and Ben have been away from each other. They have been joined at the hip ever since they officially became a couple. They weren't very physical and demonstrative of their relationship, but one could easily tell that_ it_ was there. He was protective of her and always had an arm around her, and she was, in a way, always leaning towards him.

_Why does that sound so familiar? Oh yeah, that sounds like me and someone I used to know._

I sighed as I basked in my not-so-nice epiphany.

_Damn it! I said I'm not going to think about that anymore tonight._

"Rough ride, Bells? You look a little out of it.", Eric asked when we crossed the street to head down to the cinema. Tyler answered before I could think of an excuse for my sullen mood.

"I'll bet she has a throbbing headache. ", he said casually. I was taken aback by his spot-on declaration. _Oh hell no! Don't tell me Tyler's going to be an effin' _mindreader _now too. _

"Seriously, to be stuck with Jess and Lau and a car stereo blaring away with nasal songs…", he trailed off, shaking his head. Lauren glared at him. It was the same glare that she used on me countless of times before, so that must mean she is really pissed. She started to walk away faster, so Tyler had to jog after her.

"Come on, baby. I'm sorry.", he cooed in her ear. He languidly put his left arm around her shoulders while Lauren tried to shove it off, hiding her smile. "I didn't mean anything by it", he continued, "but those songs really are _nasty_!" He whined and made a face that made us all laugh, Lauren included.

With Lauren and Tyler strutting ahead, Angela and Ben walking right behind them, and Jessica and Mike glancing awkwardly at each other, I came to the conclusion that Eric will be my unofficial partner for the night. And by partner, I mean the person who should be fast and alert enough to prevent me from falling on my face – or ass, I don't know which is worse- if my poor equilibrium decides to rear its ugly and harmful head.

I started too walk beside Eric, hoping that neither Jess nor Mike would call me back. Yeah, I was trying to set them up, and the last thing I needed to happen was to be placed between them, literally.

"So seriously, how are you holding up?", he asked me again when we were a couple of feet away from the others. "So far, I'm good." I said sincerely. True, I've had close calls tonight, but it never resulted to a full blown breakdown. _That's good enough for me… for now. _He nodded back at me and grinned, but he didn't say anything else so I took the opportunity. "I know I haven't shown you guys before, but I really am thankful for everything you have done for me."

Eric smiled widely. "We're your friends. Of course we'll do anything for you." He nudged me with his elbow before continuing. "And besides we _do _know that, somehow, you appreciate us."

"Really? And how exactly do you know that?" I raised an eyebrow at him. He just stared ahead with furrowed brows, struggling a little with words. Finally he just shrugged and answered. "Well, for starters, we do know that you prefer to suffer in silence, and it's, like, you're completely opposed to sharing your burden with us." I looked at him and motioned for him to go on.

"Uh, at first, when Edward left-" I winced at the mention of _his _name and he quickly shut up, realizing his blunder. He apologized profusely, which made him look a little boy caught with his hand inside the cookie jar. I couldn't help but chuckle at his expression. He, on the other hand, stared at me like I had suddenly grown two heads.

I composed myself and came back to our previous conversation. "So, at first…" I trailed off, asking him to continue. "Um. Yeah, at first, when _he _left" he emphasized the word, "you were so out of it that we thought you'd surely never be the same again. You completely ignored us, and treated us as if we weren't there right in front of you."

I grimaced again when I was reminded of my zombie months. I was about to apologize for that again, but Eric just continued on. "And then, you started to change. Well, uh, before, you did sit with us at lunch, but you never acknowledged us. Tyler and Mike and I even once had a debate that ended in a food fight. You were almost hit by a celery stick, and yet you still looked undisturbed, like you were sitting alone in the library or something."

I didn't know if I should cry or laugh at that. Maybe I should just do both. Coming from Eric's mouth, the situation was tragically comical. Or comically tragic.

"Then, out of the blue, you started listening to us at lunch again. It was a subtle change at first, but eventually, it was like, you returned from a long trip from somewhere and you're now learning about all the things you've missed out on. It was tense for a short while, but whatever. Finally, you were participating in discussions and even throwing retorts back at Lauren." Eric turned his head to face me, and I was a little surprised to see that he was smirking a little. "And look at you now, I mentioned _his _name, and you just laughed at my face."

Eric's short monologue rendered me speechless. Especially the part wherein I _did _manage to laugh a little when _his _name was mentioned. I didn't even notice _that. _It wasn't as easy nor painless as Eric thought it was. But when he said it that way, it was quite _heavenly._

I remained silent, and then he spoke again. "Listen, we may not say this out loud, but we, uh, sort of, uh, know that, uh, we are one of your reasons for trying to move on and leave _that _part of your past behind." I just nodded and listened quietly as he stammered the words out. "But, seriously, Bells, we want you to move on not because of us or because of Charlie or because of anyone else. We want you to do this because _you_ want to. You have to do this for yourself." I pondered on his words while I studied the ground we were walking on.

After a heavy silence, he finally cleared his throat. "Not to make you uncomfortable or anything, but you are a wonderful girl. If _he_ hadn't realized that, well, he's a stupid guy." He finished his compliment with a laugh. I shrugged my shoulders, smiling slightly.

"Now, don't go all awkward on me because I've said all these things." He demanded playfully as he nudged me with his elbow. "What I said was the truth, and nothing but the whole truth. Don't think that I just said those stuff to woo you or anything." He exhaled loudly as I chuckled. "No, seriously. Because unlike him," he cocked his head towards Mike, who was walking with Jessica a couple of meters behind us, "I do know when to let it go."

I sighed as I remembered last year when I was still "the new student", and everyone wanted a piece of the fresh meat. Mike, Tyler and Eric all took their shots, but of course, I only had eyes for one person, erm, creature.

_Again, not gonna go there._

"Yeah, thanks for that, Eric." I said earnestly which made him laugh so loud, causing Tyler, Lauren , Ben and Angela to momentarily turn around and look at us. "That bad, huh?" he asked, referring to Mike's advances. "You have no idea." I groaned while shaking my head.

At that moment, we stepped inside the theater lobby, and I was immediately assaulted by the red, orange and pink ornaments that decorated the whole place.

"What's this? The place looks like Barbie threw up all over it." I wondered quietly. Apparently, I wasn't that quiet, for Lauren spoke up resignedly. "They're called decorations, Bella."

Mike and Jess finally arrived as I voiced out my puzzlement again. "Decorations for what exactly? And do they have to be done in all shades of red?"

I gazed back at my friends after letting my eyes roam around the room, taking in the painfully bright adornments. I was met with a group of amused, sad, confused, shocked and blank faces.

A couple of seconds passed by, and instead of answering my questions, my friends were still staring at me as though I was an alien who landed on Earth and was about to terminate all living things. I concluded that I was never going to get my answers, so I looked around the room again, this time, inspecting the decors meticulously.

Random strips of red, orange and pink cloths were hanging from the ceiling. Also hanging through strands of clear strings were cardboard hearts, which were shiny because of all the glitters glued on them. And on the walls of the lobby were cardboard cupids; some were holding bows and arrows, some were with musical notes and some were holding more hearts.

_Red, orange and pink?_

_Hearts?_

_Glitters?_

_Cupids?_

It was then that it dawned on me. It hit me like a ton of steel bricks. I think I actually gained a concussion. I was sure my facial expression changed from clueless to mortified.

"Well, looks like you finally figured it out." Lauren said blankly, successfully interpreting my face. "It's the Valentines weekend."

I managed to compose myself, and nodded at her. Jess cleared her throat and called everyone's attention. She had made reservations yesterday, anticipating the large number of people who would definitely go out tonight. We gave her our payments, and then she headed off to the booth to claim our tickets, Mike in tow.

"You forgot? As in for real?" Ange asked. I didn't know how to answer her so I just shrugged my shoulders. "It kind of slipped my mind, I guess." I mumbled out. She smiled sadly at me, before going off with Ben to inspect one of the cupids on the wall.

"You got your heart broken" Lauren started, but Tyler gripped her upper arm to stop her. She just sighed and rolled her eyes at him. He released her arm, but he kept his eyes on her as she looked back at me. I was quite surprised to see that she wasn't glaring, she was _calm. _

"As I was saying, you're hurting. We do know that. But that's no reason for you- or anyone- to forget this occasion." I just stared at her, looking like a complete idiot. When I didn't say anything, she sighed again before continuing. "Bella, what I'm trying to say is that, this day isn't only for the romantic love couples share." She gestured towards Ben and Ange's direction. Right on cue, Ange laughed heartily at a joke Ben made, probably about the damn cupid.

I suddenly felt a pang of sadness. _I wish I could laugh like that again. _Well, maybe, someday. Who knows?

"You're really going to make me spell it out, aren't you?" Lauren asked, regaining my attention. I remained quiet, completely confused by where she was going with her sermon. Eric and Tyler didn't say a word either, clearly opting to stay out of _the_ girl talk.

"This occasion is not _only _for couples. It's also for… friends." Lauren shrugged, fixing her gaze somewhere behind me as she hesitantly said the last word.

_Oh, so that's what she meant._ No wonder she's suddenly uncomfortable. Lauren talking to me about friendship is like Forks having no rain shower or drizzle for a month. It's unimaginable.

I noticed that Jess and Mike were returning with the tickets. I looked down at my shoes, still very bothered. "Yeah, I guess you're right. Sorry about that."

"Oh shut it. You apologize too much." Lauren waved a hand at me and started to walk towards the snack bar, Tyler on her heels.

I was still looking at their direction when Jess grasped my arm. "What happened? What's going on?", she asked worriedly, her eyes darting from me to Lauren's direction, then back to me. Mike just stared on, wearing a puzzled look.

"I have no idea.", I mumbled back.

"Lauren", Eric sighed, successfully explaining everything with just one word.

Jess sighed as well as Mike rolled his eyes. We went on to follow the two to the snack bar. I purchased a single chocolate bar and a bottle of water. I didn't want to ruin my dinner. And besides, I had already devoured an insane amount of sweets in the car earlier- compliments of Jess and Lauren's agonizing karaoke battle. I'd probably get sick if I stuffed more food in my stomach now.

As we entered the almost full theater, I told Eric that I wanted the aisle seat. He refused to let me have the damn seat at first, blabbering something about the gentlemen should always take the aisle seat. But after pestering him and explaining that I feel a little claustrophobic, he finally gave in.

I plopped down on the seat I fought for, giving Eric a shit-eating grin. He scoffed a little at me, but smiled back anyway a second later. On his other side were Ben and Angela, who opted to share a large bucket of popcorn.

According to the ticket I callously shoved in my bag, we still had a good fifteen minutes before the previews begin. I tore the wrapper open and chomped down the chocolate bar, finishing it just after the lights were dimmed. It didn't really matter to me if I won't have anything to eat _while _watching. I wasn't even hungry.

I laid my head back at the headrest while the previews of the upcoming movies were shown, none of it really held my attention for more than a couple of seconds. But then again, these past few months, nothing really did.

Finally, the movie started, and not even half an hour into it, my head was throbbing and my chest was palpitating so hard.

_What was I thinking? Really, what have I gotten myself into?_

The movie was about alien robots and their on-going war, which for some reason, they conveniently had to stage here on planet Earth. Needless to say, it was full of CGI's that could blind anyone and sound effects that could render deafness.

When I couldn't take it anymore, I decided to finally get some fresh air. Eric caught my arm as I started to get up. "Where are you going?"

"Bathroom." I whispered back. He nodded once and gently released me. I was about to stand up again when a thought crossed my mind.

I nudged Eric and leaned closer to him. "Don't freak out if I don't come back for a while. I need some air. Maybe I'll just meet you guys at lobby later. This movie really makes my head hurt."

"Want me to come out with you? I don't mind." He asked, a little more concerned than necessary. I knew that if I said yes, he would no doubt accompany me. But judging by the way he almost drooled at the brunette on the screen, it would also be upsetting for him if he doesn't get to finish this _lovely_ movie.

"No, it's fine. I think I can manage." I scoffed jokingly as I lightly punched his upper arm.

He chuckled quietly as he nodded again. "Alright. Just text me if you change your mind. And, _please_, for our sake, don't go off too far. Your father will have all of our heads rotting away on spikes if something happens to you."

I rolled my eyes at him as he turned his attention back to the actress who 97% of the male population find sexy. Eric had pleaded jokingly, but we both knew the seriousness underneath it.

Everyone knows that Charlie is very protective of Forks. More importantly, everyone also knows that he is doubly protective of his only daughter. And after all I- we- have been through these past months, his over protective nature was even more _magnified_. Generally, I think it's safe to say that the already nonviolent town of Forks even became more peaceful, if that's even possible.

I once tagged along on one of his _fishing_ _weekends_, and his best friend, Billy, told me how everything else went down on the day my heart- and whole world- got drastically torn apart. Billy had told me that it was a complete pandemonium, and that Charlie was such a mess during the hours I was missing. He admitted, that although they have been the best of friends all their lives, he had never seen Charlie so frantic and helpless like that before. According to Billy, the mayhem only subsided when one of the search parties launched finally found me the next morning at the crack of dawn, my body soaked with mud and my face covered with rainwater and tears. It was then that he loosened up a bit, only to be enraged again when he discovered the reason behind my disappearance.

I had hard time imagining my dad as Billy had described him. I mean, he's Charlie, the pokerfaced father and the composed police chief. I used to think that he's this tough man and nothing can break him. Well, I know better now. After hearing all these, it made me exert more effort to resurface from the hellish situation I found myself in.

I was brought out from my internal reflections when I stumbled on the hallway the leads to the comfort rooms.

_Darn! Great going, at least the floor was carpeted. Wouldn't bruise my face that much._

My shoulders slumped down as I entered the bathroom and saw my reflection in the mirror. My eyes were a little red, and my alabaster skin looked extra pale. My wavy hair was slightly ruffled due to the headrest. Or maybe, it already looked like that since I got out of Jess' car earlier this evening. Blah, blah, I've never given much thought about my appearance and how I would look like to everyone else anyway. As long as I'm clean, doesn't smell and comfortably safe in my clothes, well, that's good enough for me. I never really bothered to look _cute _or _glamorous _or whatever normal girls my age strive to look. And with my pale skin and brown eyes and hair, let's just say there's not much to work with in the first place. I was plain, old Bella. Always am.

After splashing cold water to my face a couple of times, I tried to tackle the mess known to me as my hair. I was starting an argument with my hair when the door to the bathroom opened, and in walked my _favorite_ person in the world.

"You've been here for a while now.", Lauren spoke as she walked past me to proceed to one of the stalls. I just nodded at her and continued to wrestle with my hair. She just scoffed back as she closed her door.

A few seconds later, I heard the toilet flush and she walked out of the stall. She stood beside me in front of the mirror, washing her hands. And she was watching me with squinted eyes.

"You're not going back in there, are you?", she asked as she played with the soapy bubbles.

"No. I hate action films and all those explosions. And this movie is just _full _of it." I grimaced, anticipating the antagonism she will surely throw my way.

She sighed as she began to wash the soap out of her hands. "I don't want to go back either. Tyler's driving me insane." I raised an eyebrow at her reflection, and she continued. "He never shuts up about that 'hot chick on screen'. I couldn't even understand the movie because of his mumblings. I mean, yeah, she's hot, I get it. But to me, she's just like an Angelina Jolie clone or something."

I laughed a little at the last part of her ranting, nodding my head a little. I never thought that I and Lauren will finally agree on something, but well, here we are.

"Where are you going to wait for us? The movie won't be over for at least an hour and a half.", She asked as she began to walk towards the door.

"I'll meet you guys at the lobby. I really can't go back in there. My head hurts."

She nodded. "Okay, just text if you need anything." And with that, she was out of the door.

I frowned at my reflection. Did Lauren just say that I text _her _if I need anything? Or did she mean that I text someone _else_?

I shook my head and took a deep breath. I studied my reflection one last time. My skin was still pale, no surprise there, but the red in my eyes have subsided and my hair looked a little tame compared to before.

I finally stepped out of the bathroom and proceeded to the lobby. I looked around and noticed that there were also a few people loitering around. The thing is, no one there was _alone- _except for me, that is_._

They were all coupled up. Some couples were on the lounge area, very much enjoying their private worlds. Some were in line to purchase their tickets, and some were at the snack bar. And there was one brave pair who was sucking each others' faces and literally molesting their partner, right in the middle of the damn lobby.

I almost snorted at them. _Really, they shouldn't be getting movie tickets. They should be getting a room._

I walked past the _hot _couple and headed towards the wall that wasn't covered with freakin' cupids. Instead, it displayed posters of the _Now Showing _and _Coming Soon_ movies. I browsed the posters, not because I was interested in seeing any of those movies, but because posters were a lot _safer _to look at compared to the lovestruck people which currently dominates the place.

I was once again greeted by the poster of the movie my friends are still watching. Come to think of it, now that I'm out of the claustrophobic theater and away from those hellish visual and sound effects, the movie wasn't that all-bad.

The yellow robot was cute in its own way and he kind of grew on me. And their leader, who magnificently turns to a truck, was not so bad as well. The actor who played one of the soldiers- which is now married to a smashing recording artist, according to Jessica- was not bad to look at either. For the lead stars, on the other hand, well let's just say that the dorky-guy-turned-hero-who-gets-the-hot-girl plot is getting old. And the Angelina Jolie clone- Lauren's words, not mine- couldn't act. Yeah, yeah, she's got the curves and all, but she just looked like a mannequin or a battery-operated dummy.

When I ran out of posters to inspect and criticize, I decided to step out of the lobby. There was no way that I would linger around this place and watch people bask in their perfect romances, but going back inside the cinema and get my senses gravely assaulted again was absolutely out of the question.

As soon as I walked out, the cool night air greeted my exposed face. I pulled my hoodie tighter as I thought about where I would go. I remembered that there was a coffee shop just a few steps away.

I grasped the expensive tote a little tighter as I walked towards the shop. The streets weren't dark because of the bright lamps, and it wasn't empty as well, for there were a few people strolling around. But I couldn't help the choked-up feeling that was beginning to form inside me.

I couldn't help but remember the time when I was cornered by those frat boys all those months ago. And that wasn't the hard part.

The hard part was remembering how _he _saved me again. He single-handedly scared the men off and rescued me.

That night was special, to me at least. Of course the van incident provided me with the first concrete evidence, but it was that night that he finally _owned up_ to it. He took me to dinner, sort of confessed what he truly was, drove me home, and then picked me up for school the next day.

Everything began that night.

The _lie _began that night.

I suddenly felt chilly, and it had nothing to do with the cool air of the night. I took a deep breath and exhaled loudly.

_Okay, now is definitely not the right time to dwell on that. Get a grip._

I finally reached the coffee shop and immediately thanked the heavens that it wasn't crowded at all. I marched up to the counter to order.

With my cup of steaming coffee at hand, I walked towards an empty table beside the window and sank down on the soft couch. I wrapped both my hands on the cup, taking pleasure in the heat it brought to my skin. I was still a little edgy because of the walk, and the warmth and scent of the coffee helped me relax a little. As I laid my head back, I recounted the events that took place in school earlier.

The essay on how to save Romeo and Juliet's tragic love story in English class.

The discussion of the roles of powerful couples played in History class.

The teacher's decision to be _lenient- _again, his words, not mine- in Trigonometry class.

The "gift" comment of my Physics teacher.

And of course, the effin' red silk and satin curtains that now adorned the gym walls.

_Darn! Could I be any more oblivious?_

Seriously, I really don't get how I missed all those clues that pointed to the occasion.

I shook my head sadly as my phone began to vibrate. I put the cup down on the table and started to dig for my phone from the bag. It couldn't be one of my friends, as the movie wouldn't be done yet. I finally retrieved the still-vibrating phone, and sure enough, the caller ID displayed my mother's smiling face with her name just below it.

"Hi, mom."

"Hi baby! I called the house, but your dad said you went out." Her astoundingly chirpy voice was the total opposite of my flat one. "Are you out on a date? Oh, sweetie, that's fantastic! Tell me what he's like. Is he tall? Are you-"

"Hold your horses, mom!" I said to the phone a little louder than I intended, which caused the two boys at the nearest table to look at me and smile funnily.

I ignored them as I set the record straight for Renee. "Yes, I'm out. But I'm not on a date. I'm in Port Angeles with the _whole gang_." I emphasized the words, and my erratic mother sighed.

_Uh, there's no need to tell her that I'm in a coffee shop alone while the others finished the movie that I unceremoniously walked out on._

"Oh, I'm sorry sweetheart. It's just that it's Valentines, so I assumed-"

My chuckle cut her off. I could be the most pessimistic and morbid bitch on the planet, but I always will be a _baby, sweetie_ and _sweetheart_ to her. "Yeah, yeah. I still don't understand why you're so eager to give me away."

We both laughed at that, and she soon bombarded me with how Phil surprised her with a vacation trip to Hawaii and their other plans.

Well, looks like the honeymoon stage is far from over. And I didn't want to pollute my mind with any visuals of _that_.

We eventually said goodbye after that, sparing me all the juicy details on what she planned to do to my stepfather in the beautiful islands of Hawaii.

_My cougar mother, thank you for keeping me sane- most of the time anyway._

A quick glance on the time told me that I should be getting back to the cinema. I sighed as I stood up, already missing the comfort of the cushions. I chucked the almost empty cup in the nearest garbage can, and headed back to the direction of the theater.

I watched my feet strictly, praying that I wouldn't trip, for the cement really looks painfully rough. Almost halfway through my walk, I finally glanced up and once again thanked the lamp posts for their yellow lights.

And it was then that I saw _him._

He was walking on the other side of the street and heading towards the direction I came from. There were still a couple of yards between us, but his presence had already struck me motionless. I couldn't take my eyes off him, even if I tried.

He was tall and lean. _Lanky. _He must be standing six feet tall. His pale skin looked flawless in the yellowish lights, and his strong jaw looked chiseled from _marble. _His lips were a slight shade of pink, and well, it looked soft. His nose looked so masculine, and so did his eyebrows. His eyelashes were so thick that I could see it from across of the street. I couldn't see the exact color of his eyes, but I could almost swear I saw them sparkle, the light of the posts reflecting off them.

But what restricted me from moving was the way his hair danced due to the slight blows of the wind. It looked so soft and… _brown_. His hair was a dark shade of brown, and it almost looked black from a different angle.

My body was still stiff, but I managed to inhale deeply when I realized I had stopped breathing. I gripped my tote bag with cold hands as he walked past me from across the street. He didn't notice me and continued to take fluid, balanced steps. I watched him until he finally entered the coffee shop I exited only a minute ago.

I seriously deliberated on going back to the shop and look for him, but that is a plainly crazy thing to do, so I just decided to let it go. As I dragged my steps back to the cinema where my friends are, I couldn't take the mysterious boy out of my head.

No, he wasn't the man who left me behind. But for a second there, I thought he was. Except for the hair, the resemblance was undeniable. If the man who left me behind was _human_, I could swear he was his cousin or something.

I finally reached the lobby and immediately plopped down on one of the lounges, completely ignoring a couple who was making out a couple of feet away. I sighed and laid my head back as I scolded myself mentally.

_So much for not thinking about him tonight. Could've fooled anyone._

Not only did I think about him a lot tonight, but, even for a short time, I also thought he _came_ _back_ for me. _To me_.

I sighed again and closed my eyes. Not even ten minutes later, I heard the door of one of the theaters open and people began exiting noisily. I heard my friends coming towards me, so I struggled to right my newly-rattled composure.

"Well, there's our Sleeping Beauty!" Tyler hollered, and I heard the others laugh.

I rolled my eyes at him when he helped me up from the couch. "Yeah, yeah. You better have a good reason for waking me up."

"Dinner good enough for you?" Ben asked me as he held Angela's hand. "I'm starving."

I nodded back at him as Jess gave him a dirty look. "You're always starving."

Ben shrugged his shoulders, and Ange pinched his right cheek. "What can I do? I'm a growing boy."

We laughed at him as we exited the cinema. "McDonald's?", Lauren asked while pointing to the golden arches the world recognized. "Yup, Let's go." Ben said as he marched towards the place, lightly dragging Angela along.

We followed them, and again, I found myself walking beside Eric.

"How's the head?" he asked, referring to the headache that damn movie gave me.

"Better." I lied. My friends didn't have to know that it was even more intensified because of everything that happened after I stepped out of the theater.

"Oh, that's good."

I nodded and shifted the conversation to a much safer topic.

"So how was the rest of the movie?"

We finally reached the promise land that was overflowing with fries, cheeseburgers and sundaes. We made our purchases and found a booth that can comfortably sit the eight of us.

"Bleh, it was dragging and the story was kind of predictable. But the chick was hot." Eric smiled cheesily, no doubt remembering the Angelina Jolie clone who possessed the acting abilities of a brunette mannequin.

Lauren rolled her eyes and Jess scoffed at him. "Oh-kay. I've had enough of her. Please don't mention her again for the next two weeks." Then she turned to look at me. "So what did you do out here alone, Bells?"

"Yeah, Bella, you didn't break any rules, did you? Killed anyone?" Tyler teased me, and I threw a fry at him.

"Well, I washed my face at the bathroom, got coffee and tried to sleep- which of course, my friends could not allow. And no, didn't have the time to kill anybody tonight." I shrugged as I played with another piece of fry. "Nothing interesting."

"Oooh, I've got something interesting." Mike said as he smacked the table lightly. "I forgot to tell you guys earlier. The new kid dropped by our store today. Bought some plastic stuff. He left just a few minutes before you arrived."

He was immediately attacked with questions, ranging from "what does he look like?" to "do you think he's cool to hang out with?"

I, once again, voiced out the most clueless question of all. "What 'new kid'?"

Angela heard me because she was the only one who wasn't hurling questions at Mike. She smiled at me nonchalantly and explained the suddenly important "new kid bruhaha". "There's a new lawyer in town. He moved here a month ago. He has a son our age, but he arrived just yesterday, I think."

"Yeah, his name's Daniel. He stayed with a cousin in New York for a few more weeks before coming here." Mike confirmed. "I invited him to come with us tonight, but he said he already got plans. He'll start school on Monday. He's sitting with us at lunch."

So that's what the girls were gushing about in the locker room today.

"They're from New York?", Tyler asked. I just stayed quiet and let their conversation take its natural course.

"Yup. He said his dad grew tired of living in a big city, got something to do with high crime rates blah blah." Mike nodded again.

Eric laughed. "So they moved to Forks, where nothing _ever_ happens."

I sighed quietly. If my friends only knew that there was more to Forks than meets the eye. But of course, it's not my secret to tell, so I kept my mouth shut. _They_ may not be here anymore, but the secret is still _theirs_.

"Well, that would be a change. Going from busy to no work at all. But they're probably loaded so that wouldn't be a problem, financially anyway." Tyler thought out loud, and Lauren nodded. "His dad is a _lawyer_." She agreed, drawing the word out.

"You didn't answer my question. What does he look like?" Jess whined again. Mike looked at her with a pair of wide eyes.

"Jess, you're not asking me to describe another dude physically, are you?" Mike asked helplessly while the others burst out laughing. Even I smiled a little.

Jessica continued to stare at Mike, which caused him to give in. "Well, he…" He trailed off, and he looked at me for a split second before speaking again. "Fine. He looks like an all-right guy. He seems decent."

"Decent? That's what you can come up with?!" She was now on the edge, and I felt a little pity for Mike.

"Calm down Jess, looks isn't everything. And besides, you'll get to meet him the next time you go to school." I tried to pacify her growing excitement. But that didn't turn out so well, seeing as Lauren had to open her mouth again.

"Yeah, you would know, wouldn't you?" Lauren asked me, one eyebrow raised.

Something about her tone and demeanor struck me. "Excuse me? What's that supposed to mean?"

"I think you know exactly what I mean, Bella." I remained silent, as Tyler and Jess tried to shush her. Their gestures were rendered futile.

"It's quite ironic to hear _you, _Bella, preach about looks not being everything. You dated the most sought-after boy in Forks, which, by way, you're obviously still head-over-heels in love with. He's probably the most _unearthly_ handsome man on the face of the planet that you still can't get over him. So forgive me if I find that 'looks isn't everything', especially coming from _you_, hard to believe." Lauren crossed her arms across her chest.

Her words cut me deep, so deep that something inside me finally snapped. "_That _wasn't about looks." I answered back while clenching my hands to tight fists. I came so close to throwing a glassful of soda at her face. "I didn't love him because of what he looked like, okay? I love him because I just do." I choked up at the last sentence, so I took a deep breath before continuing silently. "And I thought he loved me back. But obviously, that wasn't the case."

I felt Angela grasp my tightly closed hands in hers and tried to ease the tension. It didn't change anything, but I was grateful for her efforts.

Our table was quiet. The tension seemed to render everyone speechless.

In fact, the whole place seemed to be more hushed than earlier. It was then that I realized that Lauren and I must have given the McDonald's' patrons a free show. A free glimpse of the soap opera that was my life.

"Bella, what I'm saying is that you should completely put an end to this. It's time to let things go. Don't you think that, somewhere, Edward has already moved on? Maybe it's time that you do too." Lauren sighed as the others looked on at different directions.

Jess tried to defend me. "Lau, she is moving on."

Lauren raised an eyebrow at her. "How? She can't even say the name _Edward Cullen _out loud. Of course, she's moving on." She scoffed back.

Completely ignoring Lauren, I turned to Angela and inhaled deeply. "I want to go home." I mumbled to her as she nodded at me. She took a clean tissue from the table and wiped my cheeks with it. It was only then that I realized that some tears had escaped.

She finally stood and helped me up after whispering something to Ben. We walked out to the cool night, my hand still clutched in hers. I remained unaware of everything around me, until I heard Jessica's dark threat. I didn't even realize that the other followed us out.

"If my baby gets hurt, one tiny, little scratch, you die." She warned Ben as she handed him her car keys.

We walked back to the cars and I slipped in the backseat of Jess' car without saying anything to anyone. Ben drove the car but Angela still opted to sit beside me, which left Eric the passenger seat. The ride, unlike earlier this evening, was silent. The air was tense, and I could feel my friends' anxiety.

I kept my eyes on the window, drinking in the view as it flew by. But Lauren's words kept coming back to me.

_Edward has already moved on._

_It's time to let things go._

I sniffed a little, and the noise didn't escape Angela's ears.

"Do you want to take a nap?" she whispered to me, clutching my hand a little tighter. "Then, we'll be home before you know it."

This night was already too much for me. The last thing I needed was my friends to see me thrashing around in my sleep due to the nightmare I will surely have. "I'm fine." I muttered to Angela, still looking out the window.

"Don't worry, Bells. We'll get you home soon." Ben promised.

I exhaled loudly when the Newtons' store finally came into view. We stepped out of the car as Tyler's truck parked beside us. I immediately headed towards Ben's car, avoiding the others.

A couple of minutes later, we were out of the parking lot and heading home. When we were nearing Charlie's, Angela turned in the passenger seat to look at me. ""Are you okay?"

I nodded.

She sighed and looked down. "I'm sorry this night didn't end so well. The other also asked me to apologize for them." She met my eyes again. "Especially Lauren."

I almost scoffed out loud, but caught myself. Lauren apologizing. To me. Yeah, bite me. But Angela doesn't deserve my sarcastic remarks. So, again, I lied. "It's fine."

The car came to a halt, and Ben turned to look at me as well. "Sorry, Bells, really."

I nodded back at him and smiled- more like grimaced- a little. "Thanks for the ride, guys. And for everything."

They both gave me tight smiles as I stepped out of the car. They didn't drive away until I got the front door opened. I returned their waves and finally closed the door.

Charlie was passed out on the couch, the TV still blaring away. There were a couple of empty beer cans on the center table, and his plate was also on top of it. As I reached for the remote control to turn the TV off, he was startled awake.

"Oh, sorry. I thought you were asleep."

"Go ahead. I was just waiting for you to come home." He cracked his knuckles. "I'll be gone for the weekend. Harry invited Billy and me to a fishing camp. I'll be back on Sunday night. Will you be okay here alone? I could ask Jake to come here and keep you company."

"I'll be fine, dad. I have homework to do and laundry to finish. Let's not bother Jake." I refuse to let anyone baby me, and Jake, although he was a year younger than me, tends to do exactly that. "And I'll get some groceries tomorrow."

Charlie nodded as he got up from the couch. "I'll leave some cash on the counter." He threw the empty cans in the trash while I dumped the plate on the dishwasher. "So, you kids have an interesting night?" he asked nonchalantly.

"Yeah, interesting." I mumbled.

"Good. Leave the plate. I can wash them before I leave. Get some sleep. You look like you had a long night."

_My father can really be perceptive when he wants to be._

He started up the stairs, before speaking again. "And, uh, your mother called. Did you talk to her?"

"Yeah. She called on my cell." I answered as I grabbed my tote from the kitchen counter.

"Alright. Night, Bells."

"Night, dad."

I trudged up the steps to my room and dumped the tote on my bed. Grabbing my toiletries bag, I headed to the bathroom to attend to my human nightly rituals.

When I finally, slipped under the covers, everything that happened earlier tonight came back.

The hearts and cupids.

The annoyingly loud movie.

The couples lost in their own little worlds.

Renee's assumption that I was on a date.

The nameless stranger who mysteriously reminded me of _him._

Hell, I could even _hear _the freakin' Mariah song.

And the most painful of all, Lauren's words.

_Edward has already moved on._

_It's time to let things go._

At that point, I suddenly felt tired. Not only in the physical sense, but emotionally and mentally as well.

I'm tired of crying myself to sleep every night. I'm tired of the nightmares, and waking up crying because of the nightmares. I'm tired of putting up an act for the people who truly cares for me. My parents, Phil and my friends, they don't deserve to be lied to.

Most of all, I'm tired of yearning for the one person who, in the first place, didn't even love me at all.

I wiped the tears from my eyes and cheeks, my resolution growing firm by the minute.

I shifted on the bed, dragging my eyes from my closed window, to the glow in the dark stars on my ceiling, which Charlie never removed even after Renee and I moved to Phoenix.

_Things will have to change around here._

I swore to myself as my eyes darted from one star to another. I'll start by doing something I never imagined myself doing.

_Maybe, it's time to follow Lauren's advice._


	4. The Note

**Thanks for the reviews guys :D**

**BPOV**

A stray ray of light woke me up. Oh, joy! Sunlight in Forks. This calls for a celebration.

I stretched my arms above my head, trying to wake my still sleepy cells. It's a Saturday, and I can sleep in, but lying around and waiting for sleep to come again means having more time to dwell on things. And that is _not_ good, especially after swearing my resolution last night.

_Last night._

There's something different about last night. _I_ _didn't have the nightmare last night_. Well, I had a dream, and it was still about _him_, but it was somehow different. And most important of all, I didn't wake up crying because of it.

I tried to remember what I dreamt about, but it was hazy. All I could decipher was that it was a jumble of my friends, Charlie, Renee, Phil, _him _and_ his family. _What puzzled me even more is that the mysterious boy I saw last night in Port Angeles was also in the dream.

Okay, so what's up with that? First, dreaming of the man who turned your world upside down. Then, include a mysterious person- who you haven't even met- in the same dream. That sounds so… nuts.

_What is wrong with me? I seriously have to pull my wits together._

I stumbled out of the bed, the purple comforter catching my left foot. After murmuring some unlady-like curses and finally freeing my foot, I fixed my bed which awfully reminded me of a purple dinosaur. I yawned again as I grabbed my toiletries bag, and proceeded to the bathroom.

The warm water helped to wake my muscles up. Well, I _did_ have a long, challenging night. As much as I dislike saying it, Lauren had a point. It's time for me to let everything go. It's time for me to move on, for real this time. Dwelling on the past won't do me- nor everyone around me- any good. I cannot lie to the people I care for. I cannot _pretend _anymore. Darn, Lauren _is_ right.

I wrapped my robe around me and headed back to my room. The sun may be smiling down at Forks right now, but the air still felt cold. Oh well, that's Washington for you.

But something was different. My room felt different. It seems... _colder_ than the usual. I let my gaze wander around my room, figuring out what caused the change. My eyes landed on the window, and sure enough, it was slightly open. The small gap allowed the cold air to slip inside.

I cocked my head to the side, confused. Why is that window open? Did I open them last night? Um, no, I didn't. I even remember lying on the bed and staring at the _closed_ window last night. Yeah, it was always closed. In fact, it was never opened again ever since I turned eighteen years old.

_Alright, no need to panic. The wind must have, sort of, moved it in some way._

I sighed as I moved to the window. It closed easily, without any noise or resistance. _Yep, it's got to be the wind._

I snatched some random clothes from my closet, a pair of light blue jeans and a royal blue shirt with three-fourths sleeves. I was taken aback when I saw the shirt I grabbed. It was _his_ favorite color on me.

I considered changing the shirt, but the promise I made to myself last night came back to mind. _I can't get affected anymore. _So what if he was particularly attached to this shirt? _I_ like this shirt. I'm not going to stop wearing it just because it reminds me of him. And besides, one way or another, I'll have to find a way to forget everything about him anyway. The connection of the shirt to him would soon be forgotten as well. Right?

I glared at the shirt, daring it to contradict me. I finally put it on and started to brush my damp hair.

_Damn straight, I'm right._

My eyes landed on the window again. Flashes of memories came to my mind.

Memories of him, entering my room through the widely opened window, sharing conversations, and him humming me to sleep.

_Okay, that's enough._

I tackled the tangles in my long hair with renewed tenacity. _No need to go there_. A few minutes later, my scalp was hurting so bad, and my right palm was red due to clutching the brush so hard. My hair was finally tangle-free, and fortunately, I hadn't gone bald.

I slipped on a pair of gray socks, then my favourite black Chucks. I inspected myself on the mirror, checking if I looked decent. I grabbed my phone from the tote I used last night and slipped it in my back pocket. I also retrieved my wallet and felt around for my car keys. They weren't there. I looked around, confused. Where could they be?

_Huh, don't tell me my keys walked out on me as well._

Finally deciding that I may have left them downstairs, I threw the tote back to my closet and grabbed a gray hoodie. As I headed towards my door, something shiny caught my eye. I turned my head, and found my keys sitting innocently on my study table. More accurately, it was sitting on a piece of folded paper on my study table. I picked both the keys and folded paper up.

"Well, there you are. I've been looking all over for you. How did you get here anyway?" I murmured sweetly to it, as if it was a cuddly puppy of something.

_Holy crap, I'm really losing it._

I scoffed at myself, before turning my attention to the paper. I was about to open it when the phone downstairs rang. I roughly shoved the paper in my pocket and clutched my keys tighter.

"Coming." I muttered, before scoffing again. Yeah, because the phone can hear you and hold your call for you while you stumble down the stairs.

_Correction, I have officially lost it._

I reached the phone after _actually_ stumbling down the stairs.

"Hello?" I breathed to the phone.

"Bells, you alright?" Charlie's voice was laced with concern.

"Yeah. The stairs and I just had a little disagreement." I heard Charlie sigh at the other end of the line. "Everything's fine, dad. We sorted it out. Are you with Billy and Harry now?" I conveniently changed the topic.

"Gotta be more careful, Bella." He cleared his throat. "Yeah, we're still here in Billy's. Still waiting for a couple of guys. I left the cash at the counter. What time are you going to the store?

"I'm about to head out." I said as I gathered the bills and slipped them in my wallet, along with the grocery list.

"Good thing I caught you. Harry made his famous fish fry. Jacob's on his way there with it."

"Oh, okay." As much as my father felt protective of me, he also wanted me to be fully _over_ with my previous relationship. He wanted me to move on to better things, er, person. And he is a big supporter of his best friend's son. He and Billy pushed Jake closer to me whenever they got a chance. "I'll just wait for him then."

"Alright. Gotta go now."

"See you tomorrow, dad. Take care."

"Yep. You too."

We hung up, and I chewed on a granola bar. I reviewed my grocery list, for lack of better things to do. After chugging down a glass of orange juice, I heard a car pull up. I dumped the glass on the sink and headed towards the front door. As soon as I stepped out, I was greeted by Jacob's blinding smile.

"Morning, Bells!" He's so jolly that I couldn't help but smile back. "I got a special delivery. Harry Clearwater's homemade fish fry." He waved the brown paper bag with his right hand before handing it to me.

"Thanks, Jake." I struggled to hold the heavy bag that was twice the size of my head. I couldn't understand how he managed to wave the freakin' bag around with just one hand. He watched me for a few seconds with his lips pursed into a thin line, trying so hard not to burst out laughing. After I almost dropped the bag for the third time, he bit his lower lip and finally shook his head.

"Here. Just let me..." trailed off, retrieving the paper bag from my useless arms. I noticed that he was still stifling a laugh, and his eyes were gleaming with amusement. I glared playfully at him. "Just let it out, Jacob."

He started to chuckle, and in no time, the chuckles turned into full out guffaws. I tried to hide my smile as I watched him laugh his lungs out. When he finally sobered up, I raised an eyebrow at him. "Ha. Ha. Ha. That's so funny." Apparently, he found my sarcasm funny as well that he snorted again.

"Well, it is." He shrugged, his left hand clutching the _heavy_ paper bag while his right hand massaged his stomach. "But, yeah. It's my fault. I should have known you won't be able to carry it. Standing upright is enough challenge for you as it is." He shrugged again, ignoring my shut-up-now-or-you'll-die glare. "Sorry, Bells. My bad."

I rolled my eyes at him, but chuckled nonetheless. We started to walk back towards the house, and being the Bella the heavens hate, I slipped on the driveway. My ass would have given the ground a morning kiss if it wasn't for Jake's fast reflexes.

"See what I mean?" His right arm released my waist, but he was still grinning cheekily. We both laughed at my klutziness.

We finally reached the front door with no more balance issues. I opened the door to let him in. He headed on to the kitchen, needing no directions for he and his dad were both very familiar with Charlie's house. After depositing the bag in the freezer, he turned to face me.

"Thanks again, Jake." I sat on one of the stools and smiled up at him. "Though they shouldn't have woken you up so early. It's a Saturday."

"Psh. Please. I wake up at the break of dawn." He said smugly, before noticing my wallet, hoodie and keys on the counter. "You heading out?"

I nodded. "Groceries."

"Mind if I come? Don't have anything else to do today. Quil's visiting a cousin, and Embry's most probably still in la la land, snoring the world away."

I laughed as I pictured bulky Embry snuggled in his baby blue blanket Jake and Quil often teased him about. "Let's go."

I started the truck noisily as Jake buckled up. "Huh, Never thought I'd miss that sound." He said while grinning at the steering wheel. "It's still as loud as ever."

"Yeah, no need for horns." I agreed.

Being with Jake is as easy as breathing. He knew me so well. In fact, he was the only person, I think, who _really_ got me when I felt so broken. He somehow knew that I didn't want to listen to any kind of music, that he removed the stereo- which was a gift for my eighteenth birthday from some _people_ who must not be named- from the truck without asking any questions. And much to our fathers' delight, he had the cunning ability to make me laugh a _real_ laugh.

Anyone may find it hard to believe, but Jacob and I have never let our fathers' matchmaking activities affect our friendship. I'm not oblivious to the fact that he had- and still has- this little crush on me, but he never took advantage of me or our friendship, nor made me feel uncomfortable. In short, he did the exact opposite of what Mike did. We just did whatever feels right. The point is, I'm comfortable with Jacob Black. I mean, hell, we used to make mud pies when we were little.

"Want me to install it back?" He gestured towards the empty space where the radio should have been.

_I'm putting my life back together. Putting the radio back in the truck seems like a good start._

"Yes, please." I nodded, keeping my eyes on the road. "When you're not busy."

"I've always got time for you. You know that." Jake said simply as he inspected some of the wires. "Just give me the stereo when you want it back."

"I'm thinking of buying a new one." I blurted out. "Maybe you can help me pick something out?"

Yes, I'm bringing music back to my truck- to my life, actually. But there is absolutely no way that I'd be touching _that_ stereo again, let alone have it installed back in my truck. And besides, I doubt that it'll still work. I'm pretty sure I _murdered_ it. Yes. Me. Nonviolent, calm Bella Swan. Murdered an innocent, defenseless car stereo. The chief of police will be so proud.

Jake started to say something, but closed his mouth again instead. "Of course." He finally said after a few seconds, his eyes staring at the road as well.

The parking lot of the grocery store, thankfully, wasn't crowded when we got there, considering that the townspeople of Forks ceremoniously do their grocery shopping during the weekends.

"Let's do this!" Jake's enthusiasm brought a smile to my face. "What are we getting first?"

"Well, first, we are getting a _cart_." I said as we entered the establishment.

We went on with our groceries, picking condiments and breakfast stuff before heading to the fresh meat, produce and dairy products section. Jake pushed the cart while I picked out the things from the shelves.

My cell phone suddenly rang just as I placed a jug of milk down. I frowned down on the caller ID. "Jess?" Apparently, she's not sleeping in today. It's kind of surprising, actually.

"Morning, Bella!" She started to say something else when the paging system of the store went on, making her words incoherent to me.

"Sorry, what was that again?" I asked as the noise went off.

"Where are you?"

"Doing the groceries."

"Oh okay. Um, I was…" She trailed off and cleared her throat. "How are you?"

"I'm fine, Jess. Everything's okay." _Well, sort of_.

"Bells, we're really sorry about last night. I didn't know-"

"Jess." I cut her off. "I'm fine. Let's just not talk about it, okay?"

I heard her sigh on the other end. "Okay. If that's what you really want. _I_ won't talk about it." She emphasized the word. "But there's..." She trailed off again.

Jessica never had the problem of stating what's on her mind, so her hesitation was tapping on my curiosity. "What's wrong?"

"Uh, I need your help regarding something?" Her statement ended up sounding like a question at the end.

"Yeah, sure. I'll have to get home first though."

"Of course!" She let out a sigh of relief, and then her cheery voice was back. "Just text me when you get home."

"Yep." We were about to hang up when a sudden thought struck me. "Uh, Jess, this isn't about Mike, is it?"

Her girly giggle made me a little nervous. "Ugh, no, Bella. My world doesn't revolve around him, you know?"

_Oh, it doesn't? Who would have known?_

That's a relief, nonetheless. "Alright. I'll see you later."

"So she's still gaga for him, huh?" Jake chuckled as I ended the call. Frequently hanging out in La Push, my school friends have met Jake, Quil and Embry. And quite honestly, they've all become tight. They've all gotten along so well that we spend at least two weekends a month by the beach. Everyone knew about everyone else's business. Especially Jess' obsession for Mike, and Mike's obsession for me.

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. "She's asking help for something. Didn't say about what though." I inspected the list one last time before tapping Jake's arm. "Alright, we got everything."

He pushed the cart to the counter to check out while I trailed after him. "Good morning, Isabella. You get lovelier everytime I see you. How is your father doing?" Rita, a lady in her late fifties and a good friend of Charlie's, greeted me as she punched in the items. I have never been good with compliments, so naturally, I did what I do best.

I blushed.

I looked down and bit my lower lip as I felt my ears turn hot. "Thanks." I mumbled out as I heard Jake snort beside me. "Charlie's doing okay." I smiled timidly back at her. She nodded and turned her gaze at Jake.

"And it seems to me that you, young Jacob Black, are growing up to be a fine man. Come here." She raised her right hand and pinched his cheek, causing me laugh lightly.

_Oh yeah, Jake, payback's a bitch._

"You look like you're around six feet tall." Rita continued to asses him as he composed himself.

"Yep." He grinned at her. "And still growing." He added smugly as Rita laughed and took the bills I handed to her.

"Oh, you charming little lad." She cooed as I laughed some more. Standing at five feet and four inches tall, I could never use the adjective "little" on Jake.

Rita smiled at me again as she handed me my change. "It's so nice to see that smile brighten up your pretty face again. Give my regards to Charlie and Billy." Jake and I both nodded at her, and with a final wave, we exited the store.

Jake helped me load the paper bags to the truck, a silly grin still plastered on his face. "Why don't you just start the truck? I'll finish this. We wouldn't want to bruise that _lovely_ face of yours."

I snorted at him, but climbed on the driver's seat anyway. "Shut up, _little_ Jacob." He finished loading the bags and returned the cart, still chuckling.

"She looks happy to see you." He stated as he sat beside me. "Rita's totally cheery."

I shrugged. "Well she looks happy to see you too." I have an idea as to why she was so ecstatic to see me smiling again. But then again, people's assumptions that Jake and I are involved romantically were nothing new to us. We knew where we stand, so it didn't really bother us. "And correct me if I'm mistaken, but it seems to me you were getting your charm on." I joked at him.

He widened his eyes at me. "Why, Bella! Are you _jealous_?!" He joked back. "I never intended to make you jealous. You're still number one on my list."

I laughed a little. "You have a list?" He shrugged, laughing as well. "Whatever, Jake. I'm not into the cougar thing."

"Aww come on! It's just a year. You're older than me by _one_ year." He shook his head, still chuckling. "I was born a year after you, and you won't let me live that down? Haven't you heard of Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher? Or Madonna and that new boy toy of hers?" Jake's whine had me laughing again.

"How do you know these things, Jacob? Especially the Madonna part? Are you crossing the fence?" I raised an eyebrow at him.

"Shut up, Bells! And keep your eyes on the road please." He laughed while shaking his head again. "Rachel and Rebecca left a bunch of girly magazines when they last visited. You should have seen Billy's face when he read some of the articles in _Cosmo_." Jake started to laugh heartily again. "His eyes bugged out so much that I thought they were going to pop out from his face. And his face..." he laughed so hard that he couldn't continue speaking. I couldn't help but laugh as well. "Billy's face turned pale at first, then it turned red, then turned purple. He told me to burn all of the magazines immediately."

_Poor Billy. His twin daughters must have shocked the hell out of him._

We continued laughing until I parked the truck behind his Rabbit. We climbed out and brought the groceries to the kitchen. "What time is Jess going to be here?" he asked as we set the bags down on the counter.

"I don't know. I'll have to text her to let her know I'm home."

"Okay, I'll go now. I don't think my masculinity could handle a girl talk."

"Thanks again, Jake." I hugged him. "See you soon."

"Yup." He was about to go out the front door when he turned around. "And don't worry about the stereo. I know a place that sells good stuff for cheap prices." He winked at me. "I'll take care of it."

"Okay."

I watched him as he drove away, suddenly feeling alone. I reached for my phone to text Jessica. Not even thirty seconds later, she replied that she was already on her way. That was fast. Maybe it's really something important.

Before depositing the groceries to their rightful places, I headed up to my room to dump my wallet, hoodie and phone down. As I pulled the keys out of my pocket, a slip of paper floated down to the floor.

_Oh, yeah, the paper I found in my desk earlier this morning._

As I bent down to pick it up, I felt a cool gust of wind in my room. My eyes automatically went to the window, and again, it was opened slightly. _What is wrong with this window? It's never opened accidentally before._ My hand clutched the paper tightly as I made my way to it and close it again for the second time this morning.

_Maybe I'll have to ask Charlie to fix it for me. The last thing I need right now is to fall out my window in my futile attempts to fix it myself. _

I sighed as I sat down on my bed, still staring at the window curiously. I can't help but feel that something's different. I sat there, playing with the piece of paper and daring the wind to open the effin' window again.

_This is stupid. I can't freak out over a damn window._

I sighed again as I looked down, studying the piece of paper. _What is this anyway? _I studied it for a while before finally opening it and reading what was written inside. And what was written inside brought more questions than answers.

_**Bella,**_

_**I know it doesn't look like it now, but you will be fine. You'll get through this. Everything will be alright. Live for what you have now, and you will be better in no time. You'll see.**_

I read it over and over before finally folding it again. Questions attacked my brain, one after another. Where did this note come from? Who sent me this? How did it get on top of my study table?

I was submerged in confusion when the door bell finally rang. Jessica finally arrived. It's a good thing I guess. If there's anyone who can divert my attention from all the bewilderment I was currently feeling, it's Jess.

I placed the note back to the study table, and spared one last look at the window. It was still close. I took deep breaths while heading down the stairs. I noticed that because of everything that has happened in my room, I had completely forgotten to attend to the grocery bags which were still sitting on the kitchen counter. _Oh well, a few minutes won't hurt them._

"Coming, Jess!" I shouted as the bell rang again. I took one final deep breath before opening the door.

But instead of the diversion I was looking forward to, I suddenly found myself more confused than ever. The bewilderment I was feeling was even _doubled_.

For standing in Charlie's freakin' doorway, was someone who is definitely _not_ Jessica Stanley.

**Reviews please?**

**And any guesses on who's standing on the doorway? Hahahaha :D**

**And for those who are wondering, the stereo that Bella "murdered" was from Emmet, Rosalie and Jasper.**


End file.
